Human relationships both personal and with others are as real as one make them dealing with love and the thought process. Throughout life people have learned many things about relationships and human interaction. The relationships us as people have with others tend to be the relationships one has within them self. The choices we make affect not only ourselves but the people where involved with. The emotional struggles that are encountered within are often acted out with another. Using information from “Life of Pi” by, Yann Martel and “The Short Happy Life of Francis Macomber” by, Ernest Hemingway I’ll explain human relationships.
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Taking into consideration why this is true in several ways. Why do relationships exist externally and internally? They exist because people want them to exist and people tell themselves that they exist. Pi states, “Love is hard to believe, ask any lover. Life is hard to believe, ask any scientist. God is hard to believe, ask any believer” (Martel 297, 99). Ones relationship and partnership with another person is whatever they want it to be, the love one has for another is what you make of it. Whether someone loves another person or not they are always going to be right in their own mind. Although the other person may have a completely different outlook on the relationship and feel differently, one must understand that your representation of what makes a good relationship may not be the same as the other persons. So the relationship one has with another person includes what one thinks of them and what one believes they think of you.
Even if relationships exist in some way shape or form beyond reality and independent of ones thoughts, one will never have access to the real viewpoint. Pi says, “If you stumble at mere believability, what are you living for? Isn’t love hard to believe?” (Martel 297, 99). How one views a relationship is never the same as another person. Love is often used to describe couples in a relationship, but in all reality it may just be a word that has no meaning until we give it meaning. Love is the feeling you get when one touches another, or maybe it is the feeling one gets just being in the presence of one another, maybe there’s no meaning at all. Francesco, Scott, and Stephanie state that, “Intense romantic love does not just mean loving someone, but it also means ”being in love”” ( Bianchi-Demicheli, Grafton, Ortique 91). Taking that into thought, one can say only they know what true love means and feels like. Believing in love weather it is for the same reasons as anyone else or for different reasons believing is making it realistic. “when involved in a romantic, passionate and intimate relationship, the person actively strives for the happiness of the loved person” (Bianchi-Demicheli, Grafton, Ortique 91) state the authors from the article “The Power of Love on the Human Brain”. Although one may never grasp the true meaning of love in a human relationship believing in love and human relations is reality enough.
With embracing the relative nature and true meaning of relationships, one will be able to relate to people much easier. Getting where one wants to go is much easier when one knows what direction to go with your relationship. As Norvin willingly protests, “What troubles you is that you are costing the others in your life dearly – so you feel it is time for you to die, or past time. I want to explore a version of this concern, according to which it can be selfish to remain alive because of the costs to loved ones, and wrong for that reason to do so, even if these are costs they want to pay for your sake” (Richards 517). As life goes on and time passes, relationships change sometimes for the better and sometimes for the worse. The knowledge someone can gain from relationships overtime gives them the ability to change it or improve it. One can also improve ones internal relationship, such self-esteem and self-respect, by working on ones relationships with others. Quite often how someone’s relationship with another turns out isn’t always in their control. People all feel differently and react differently to things especially when it comes to death, illness, loneliness, or love. What Norvin is trying to say is, being on ones death bed calling it time isn’t always your choice when one is involved with a significant other, they too have a say in what happens whether one believes it to be a burden or not. Human relationships can also be more then just love and finding ones self, they can be about wealth, power, and beauty. Some people date to gain power and wealth, while others date strictly based on beauty of one another. All human relationships happen for a particular reason whether one agrees with it or not. Often women or men will date a wealthier person for their money and for the feeling of power and security never knowing the true feeling of love. Men and women will also date someone that’s more beautiful then them to achieve self moral whether the relationship is good or not. Furthermore dating for wealth and power often ties into dating for beauty. Most of the time one person has the wealth aspect while the other has the beauty aspect. Margot and Francis Macomber from the short story, “The Short Happy Life of Francis Macomber” (Hemingway 1277-1299) had such a relationship and Francis knew this, “His wife had been through with him before but it never lasted. He was very wealthy, and would be much wealthier, and he knew she would not leave him ever now” (Hemingway 1289). He knew this because Margot only stayed with him for his money not because she loved him. Some people never know what love is when there conscious and internal relationship with them self is tuned for wealth and power rather then love and compassion. Along with Francis knowing why Margot would never leave, Margot knew this, “If he had been better with women she would probably have started to worry about him getting another new, beautiful wife; but she knew too much about him to worry about him either” (Hemingway 1289). Francis was with Margot for her beauty and because he thought to himself he could never do any better. In the short story “The Short Happy Life of Francis Macomber”, “They had a sound basis of union. Margot was too beautiful for Macomber to divorce her and Macomber had too much money for Margot ever to leave him” (Hemingway 1290). The union between two people whether it be same sex or opposite sex will always be a mystery. The choices one makes, the internal relationships one has with themselves, and the external relationships one has with others all play a huge part in human interactions and relations. How one may picture a happy relationship may not always turn out to become reality and only a subjective fantasy. Danu Anthony once said, “Chronic feelings of higher or lower self-esteem influence the quality of one’s social bonds because chronic feelings of self-worth influence one’s beliefs and social behaviors” (Stinson 413). Ones self-influence and self-esteem can reflect the way they interact with others. Often if one feels miserable and depressed, it will often affect the relationship because of the mood their in. Working on ones self-esteem and self-respect will improve the relationship they have with others. If they choose not to improve or work on their self-esteem and self-respect they will never achieve the full potential of their relationship that they seek.
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Believing that the true value of human relationships is that they are there to serve as pointers and reminders of unconditional love is golden. According to a subjective relationship, when you forgive and love all parts of yourself, one will forgive and love all other human beings and accept the human relationship as it is. The more you focus on making your internal relationships between yourself better the more loving and caring your human relationships will become. Hold unconditional love, and the ability to accept all for who they are in your consciousness, and you will see it reflected in your reality and relationship.
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